Female Novel
Chapter 33: Not Yet Ready
Daryl can't even look at me straight in the eye while he's driving his car. I don't know why I felt irritated
to myself.
Why did I even tell him that? Why did I reveal that to him?
After that talk, he didn't say a word to me. He's just on his knees while crying silently.
I bit my lip again as I remember his expressions. I don't know why I suddenly felt so soft from seeing
him like this. This isn't what I planned it to be.
When we reached the NPK, he went silently off his car and opened the door for me. Before going out, I
looked at him.
He didn't look back at me. He's frowning, not only because he's angry, not only because he's
emotional, but it was something else.
“Are you going inside?” I asked him.
He just sighed and shook his head.
I nodded and went off.
He stood on his car waiting for me to get inside. When I'm already at the door, I heard the engine of his
car.
I sighed.
Why do I suddenly feel like my heart is too heavy? I took another deep breath and started walking.
When I reached the room. I stayed on my door for a while, just staring at the gray rough surface of it.
Looking at my reflection at the thin name plate.
He is now aware. But he didn't ask where they are.
I put on my thumb on the door to unlock. And went inside.
I am feeling so heavy. I am feeling worse. I am feeling stupid and I feel like I'm really stupid.
I grabbed my phone from my bag and dialed Julius.
I guess he's the only one who can understand me right now.
“Julius.” I whispered.
My tears began forming on my eyes.
“Yes, Neysha? What happened?” He asked excitedly from the other side.
“I told the twins father about them.” I said directly and my voice broke.
I heard something got dropped from his side making me frown.
“You did what!” He shouted.
I cried. I held my chest as I walked to the sofa and dropped my body on it.
“Yes...I did. And I don't know.” I sobbed and cried.
I don't know. Why everything seems so complicated. I thought I was stronger but I am just a weak shit.
And will always be a weak shit.
I cried and cried while Julius was on the other side. I don't know and I don't understand how am I
capable of crying this much after many years. Because the last time that I can remember, I cried like
this way back 5 years ago only.
Did I deprived myself that much to hide these ugly feelings? And right now, I feel like my heart is going
to burst out.
I didn't even realize it that I fell asleep on the couch from too much crying.
I still have a pending schedule in my list but I don't feel like going because my body is tired.
I just wore a robe while sipping a coffee. I am texting my assistant that I will not be present on the
schedule because I am sick.
I went to the kitchen and brewed some coffee.
I am reading some magazine while sipping some coffee.
My phone beeped so I opened it only to see that my assistant sent me the approval of my request.
I stopped eating bread for a bit when I realized that I woke up on the bed when I can clearly remember
that I fell asleep on the sofa.
I blink my sore eyes and shrugged. Maybe I sleep walked. Or maybe Daryl came and carried me to the
bed.
I sighed and sipped again.
Every time what happened in Villa Kristine flashbacks in my head, I always gets emotional, I don't know
what might Daryl do next and that's a little bit of frustrating.
I went back to my room with the coffee in my hand. And I almost spilled it when I saw Daryl in wet hair,
he's got his pants on now but he's still topless.
So, he's really here?
“You..you're here?” I asked the obvious.
He watched me with his eyes full of emotions I can't decipher.
“Yes. You were asleep last night so just carried you here.” He said casually.
I nodded and walked straight on the coffee table. I didn't notice him earlier because maybe he's there in
the bathroom and I already went straight to the kitchen.
“Ney.” He called me after a moment of silence between us.
I turned to look at him.
“Yes.”
He looked down and wore his white sleeves.
“I'm sorry.” He whispered; I can barely hear it.
I didn't answer him. I just stayed there, standing while looking him intently.
“I will make it up. I will make up everything, everything that I lost.” He said seriously and with conviction
in his voice.
I gulped. I don't know if this information would bring me happiness, or fear... I don't know.
“Okay.” I just said.
Pain crossed his eyes. I don't care for a moment.
I know there are times that I may feel that I am soft for him but my anger still consumes me in some
reasons.
“I will do everything, Neysha.” He whispered.
“I'll do anything to make everything on the right spot. I will do everything to amend with the time I lost
with you...and to our family.”
That statement just made my heart skip a beat.
Daryl took five steps towards me and pulled me head.
I gasp, especially when our lips met. He's kissing me so passionately as if he's explaining more and
more through this one.novelbin
I don't know Daryl, I don't know what will happen next, but one thing's for sure.
I am not yet ready to show you our children. I am not yet ready to show you to my children.
And I don't think I could ever be ready to it.
***End of Chapter 33