Female Novel
Chapter 96
There’s just something… Calvin had called immediately he got the missed call notification. He’d explained that the reason he didn’tpick up is because he was in a meeting and his phone had been silent.
He wanted to come home right away, but told him that everything was now fine. That I had taken
care of the situation and that Gunner was fine. He wasn’t crying anymore. Neither was he sad.
That was enough for me.
He was reluctant, but he finally agreed given that his meeting would run late.
Now here I was cooking dinner for us. With thousands of thoughts running through my head. It’s like Ican’t get a break from my own thoughts. They’re constantly there and now there some that are addedconcerning Gunner.
“What are we having for dinner mom?” Noah asks sitting down at the counter.
“Yes, what? I am starving” Gunner adds smiling at me.
There it was again. That damn smile. It’s not that I hated it. I could never hate any smile Gunner givesme. It’s just that it fucking bothers me so much. There was something about it that I just couldn’t placemy finger on.
“I’m not sure” I tell them. “Why don’t we see
what my craving will pick?”
Noah smiles wide and turns to Gunner. “Mom has insan
cravings. Sometimes they’re really great
and other times it’s totally disgusting”
Gunner nods his head. “Can I help?”
“Sure. Why don’t you flow the chicken?” I tell him.
Noah wasn’t really that helpful in the kitchen. In fact he was a complete disaster. That’s why he normallynever helps unless it’s something he can actually do. Something he won’t mess up.
I got out the marinating sliced chicken breasts and the Ziploc bag of seasoned flour and handed themover to Gunner.
He took them willingly with a smile on his face. One thing I learned about him was that he loved food andhe also loved cooking. He was going to make a very lucky woman happy one day if he continued likethis.
“As for you, Noah, you can help with the dessert” I turn to him
+15 BONUS
“At least that’s easy and I won’t mess it up” he says grinning, making both me and Gunner laugh
He was self–aware. I liked that about him.
“Now, if you get the buttermilk marinade on your fingers, don’t get it near your eyes. It’ll burn,
because of the Tabasco and salt that is in it I warn Gunner.
“Okay”
We get to work. Chatting and simply having fun. I was so glad that I could give this to Gunner. So happythat I was able to give him happiness. I couldn’t take away all his pain and sadness, but
this had to be enough for now.
He was a lovely boy. Shy at first, but when you got to know him, you realize how amazing he is. I
just couldn’t understand why his mother would do this to him.
From what little I gathered. She doesn’t want to be in his life. I don’t know if it’s by choice or
maybe forced circumstances, all I know is that it was hurting Gunner. The last thing I want is for
him to grow up with issues just like me.
“This is what I’ve always wished and prayed for” his low voice pulls me back to the present.
“What?” Noah asks him.
Gunner takes deep breath before answering. “This. Having a mom by my side. Watching her cook
and cooking alongside her. That kind of thing. Don’t get me wrong, dad is amazing but he is a dad.
He can never be my mom”
Damn it. There goes my heart shattering into pieces for this little boy. If I could, I would give him
the world, but that is not sible. Some things just aren’t possible. Like how Noah wants Rowan
and I to get back together.
“You okay, honey?” I ask him.
He smiles up at me. “Yes. I have you, Noah and dad. That is enough. I know you’re not my real
mom, but you’re like a mom to me already.”
I leave what I am doing and give him a hug before kissing his forehead.
“Damn!” Noah groans.
2/5
+15 BOMUS
“Language!” I chastise him and he goes quiet.
“I’m sorry mom ” Noah says after a while “I’ve been pushing and pushing for you and dad to get backtogether without realizing how lucky I am that you’re both in my life. Will you forgive me?”
I open my arms for him and he immediately steps into them. I close them around him before
kissing his forehead too.
“You’re forgiven” I tell him while letting him go.
“I’ll keep praying and hoping, but I’ll stop pushing so much.”
“Thank you” I say
We get back to work and eventually finish cooking. They both help me set the table and we sit
down to eat.
With the three of us, or should I say four, we almost clean everything, but I put my foot down for someleft overs. Calvin was probably going to come home tired and hungry. He won’t have time to
cook something.
After dinner, I make them shower and then it is off to bed for them.
It was after they were asleep that the idea came to me. I had a five bedroom house. There was still anextra room even after turning one of them into a nursery. The last remaining bedroom could be
Gunner’s room.
He could sleep there anytime he was over and it could also be his safe space while he was here. Iquickly get excited about the idea. Immediately I take a note pad and started scribbling down
what I would need.
I’ll have to ask Calvin for
be helpful when it com
know what he likes.
rmission, but I was sure he’d agree. Well I hoped he would. Plus he’ll
the design of the room. He knows Gunner better than anyone. He’ll
I was just finishing up the list of essentials when the doorbell rang. I wiggle up and go to open it,
pretty sure that it will Calvin on the door. I wasn’t wrong.
“Hi” I tell him.
“Hi to you too” he says, giving me a tired smile.
I step aside and he comes in. We move to the living room.
3/5
*15 BONUS
“It’s quiet Are they asleep?” he asks
“Yes”
I didn’t know what to say. I had so many question, but I was afraid of stepping out of boundary.
“About today? Gunner was crying because of his mother” I start slowly.
The moment I say those words, his face turns stone cold.
“Don’t mention that bitch to me again! She has done nothing, but hurt me and my son over and overagain. What kind of woman abandons her son? I get and understand that she doesn’t love me and shenever will, it hurts, but I learned to accept that. Turning her back on Gunner is something else. I will neverforgive her for that” he was breathing hard and his voice was cold.
Unrequited love. Wasn’t it just a bitch? I’ve suffered through it since I first fell for Rowan. I didn’t want myfriend to go through it, but it looks like he has.
“Every time I call and she refuses to come see Gunner kills me. He is amazing, yet his mother
wants nothing to do with him. I tried hiding it from him, but as he got older he started to understandthings. He started to understand that his mother doesn’t want him and she wants nothing to do with him.Fuck I hate her so much, but I also can’t stop loving her” he says before
continuing. Pain radiating from his eyes.
“I want to give Gunner the world, but the one thing he wants is totally out of my reach. I regret ever fallingin love with her. Regret ever meeting her. But the thing is, regretting her means
regretting Gunner and that is one thing I can never do”
Where have I heard those words from? Yeah from my own lips. Didn’t I tell Rowan the same thing?
That as much as I want to regret him, I can’t because it means regretting Noah.
“I don’t have the right Is for you. Hell. Our situations are the same, but different at the same
time. All I can tell you is, De there for Gunner as best as you can. Love him so much that he doesn’t
miss the love of his mother. Show him that he is enough and that it’s his mother’s loss not his”
Those are the only words I can offer. I wanted to say more, but I didn’t have the words to comfort
him. He nods his head and we stay in silence.
“Thank you, Ava. For being there for me and my son” he says after a while.
“You’re welcome”
4/5
+15 BONUS
“It’s quiet. Are they asleep?” he asks
“Yes”
I didn’t know what to say. I had so many question, but I was afraid of stepping out of boundary.
“About today? Gunner was crying because of his mother” I start slowly.
The moment I say those words, his face turns stone cold.
“Don’t mention that bitch to me again! She has done nothing, but hurt me and my son over and
over again. What kind of woman abandons her son? I get and understand that she doesn’t love me
and she never will, it hurts, but I learned to accept that. Turning her back on Gunner is something
else. I will never forgive her for that” he was breathing hard and his voice was cold.
Unrequited love. Wasn’t it just a bitch? I’ve suffered through it since I first fell for Rowan. I didn’t
want my friend to go through it, but it looks like he has.
“Every time I call and she refuses to come see Gunner kills me. He is amazing, yet his mother
wants nothing to do with him. I tried hiding it from him, but as he got older he started to
understand things. He started to understand that his mother doesn’t want him and she wants nothing todo with him. Fuck I hate her so much, but I also can’t stop loving her” he says before continuing. Painradiating from his eyes.
“I want to give Gunner the world, but the one thing he wants is totally out of my reach. I regret ever fallingin love with her. Regret ever meeting her. But the thing is, regretting her means
regretting Gunner and that is one thing I can never do”
Where have I heard those words from? Yeah from my own lips. Didn’t I tell Rowan the same thing? Thatas much as I want to regret I can’t because it means regretting Noah.novelbin
“I don’t have the right words for you. Hell. Our situations are the same, but different at the same time. AllI can tell you is; be there for Gunner as best as you can. Love him so much that he doesn’t miss the loveof his mother. Show him that he is enough and that it’s his mother’s loss not his”
Those are the only words I can offer. I wanted to say more, but I didn’t have the words to comfort him. Henods his head and we stay in silence.
“Thank you, Ava. For being there for me and my son” he says after a while.
“You’re welcome”
After, he leaves carring Gunner’s sleeping form and the food I saved for him.
+15 BONUS
Hours after he leaves. Hours after I go to bed. Gunner’s smile still haunts my mind. His smile and
his mysterious mother invade my every thought.
There was something I was missing. If only I could piece the pieces together then maybe I could figureout why this whole issue bothers me so fucking much. Maybe I can figure out why my
mind won’t give me piece concerning the matter.